Dosri Shadi
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This Application / Book are guide to get more marriages.
I have been trying throughout this time to sever my relationship with either of them - my wife or the other woman. But I have struggled to do so and every time I take a decision I take it back because I get very scared to go either way. I gave my wife a divorce notice which I took back after 2 months thinking that I would be able to let go of the other woman. But that has not been possible and I find this whole situation becoming very unbearable. Not only for me but my wife, my family and children, the other woman and her family etc. It is also affecting my work and other things.
I would like to know:
1. If I was to take a second wife - what are the conditions under which one is allowed to take a second wife in Islamic law? How does one go about doing that? Do I need my wife's permission? What if I am unable to get it?
2. Are these circumstances "enough" for me to divorce my wife? Does Islam look at this as justifiable grounds for divorce?
3. Can I insist on keeping my children? They are 8 and 5 years old. Is it better for young children to stay with the mother or the father?
4. Are there any instructions in the Shari`ah which will condemn me in the eyes of Allah if I were to get a divorce under the circumstances?
5. Are there any instructions in the Shari`ah which provide guidance for ones relationship with children after separation/divorce? So as to ensure that they are emotionally and physically protected?
6. On personal grounds, would you advise me to continue my marriage under the circumstances? Do you think that it is better for my children if I was to stick to my marriage?
Advice on second marriage
In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.
May Allah Subhanah reward you with the best of this world and the Hereafter for your kind comments of encouragement for our humble efforts in the propagation of the Truth. We humbly hope, beg, and pray the Merciful Lord accepts our humble and weak efforts, forgives us our shortcomings, and saves you, us, and all the believers from the torment of the Hell Fire. Ameen.
Islam has recognized that man is created polygamous by nature, and has thus allowed the man a legal and honorable way to practice polygamy; and has commanded the believers to honor and treat each of his wives equally and with justice.
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 4 Surah Nisaa verse3: If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, marry women of your choice two or three or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them) then only one.
The one and only restriction that Islam puts on a person who wants to practice polygamy is justice! Justice and equality in the time he spends with each of them, on the amount he spends on each of them, on the gifts he gives to each of them, etc.
Sunan of Abu-Dawood Hadith 2128 Narrated by Abu Hurayrah
The Prophet (saws) said: When a man has two wives and he is inclined to one of them, he will come on the Day of Resurrection with a side hanging down.
Allah Subhanah has permitted the believing man, that if he wishes to do so, he may have upto a maximum of four wives at any one time. If the man decides to exercise this right given to him by Allah Subhanah, there is absolutely no sin upon him.

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